I’m having a bit of a crisis of confidence at the moment. It’s just over a week since I changed jobs and it’s becoming blatantly obvious that all the other ST2 and CT2 anaesthetists here (i.e. those employed at the same level as me) are actually much better than me. They’ve all done lots of anaesthetics in various foreign countries before coming to work here and thus, they’re all much more experienced than I am. They’re happy to do neuro-axial anaesthesia, paediatrics and central lines completely unsupervised and I feel I’m quite a way off that stage yet.
I know that it’s not a fair playing field and that, despite being employed at the same level, they’re far more experienced than me… but I can’t shake the nagging feeling that I am currently way behind “the competition.”
The fact that it’s dawning on me what a colossal task I’m facing when I sit my exam in October isn’t helping. Perhaps it’s because I’ve just come off a long shift and am feeling a bit tired and emotional, but – right now, my confidence is lower than it’s been in months.
I know that it’s not a fair playing field and that, despite being employed at the same level, they’re far more experienced than me… but I can’t shake the nagging feeling that I am currently way behind “the competition.”
The fact that it’s dawning on me what a colossal task I’m facing when I sit my exam in October isn’t helping. Perhaps it’s because I’ve just come off a long shift and am feeling a bit tired and emotional, but – right now, my confidence is lower than it’s been in months.
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